Thursday, July 22, 2010

Tarot Decks Take Time.

Well THAT was the fucking UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR!!!!

Word is currently: August 18th.

Mother. Of. Gods.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Shit MY Dad says...

Dad: So, whadya do this weekend? Did you stay in town?

Me: I went to Cornwall! I taught a Tarot class.

Dad: Oh! So, hanging out with those anarchistic--vegan--Wiccan--people out in the woods sacrificing animals and Republicans and stuff?

Me: No. And no, we don't sacrifice animals or people.

Dad: You don't? You don't sacrifice anything?

Me: Sometimes we sacrifice vegetables.

Dad: I think you Wiccans should sacrifice Sarah Palin. And just eat the vegetables.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

The Five Agreements by Courtney A. Weber

A guide to a fulfilling existence:

Be Impeccable With Your Word.

Don't Take Anything Personally.

Don't Make Assumptions.

Always Do Your Best.

Never eat anything with a main ingredient called "defatted peanut flour."

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

How it would sound if I were a Christian.....

Would the following sound kind of...dumb?

"OOh! A cross. You know what that means, don't you? Crosses are some freaky shit!!!"

"Hey, Courtney! Haven't seen you in awhile. How's all that...what do you call it...Christian-Churchy stuff going?"

"Oh, meant to tell you. Found out my co-worker is a Christian! I suggested you be friends on Facebook."

(Upon meeting my boyfriend.) "Oh, wow! You're wearing a cross, too. Were you into that before you met Courtney, or did she suck you in?"

"So, it's Easter, right? That's kind of an important holiday, right? Are you going to nail someone to a cross? Isn't that what you guys do on your Holy holiday?"

"Hello, everyone. I'd like you to meet my friend Courtney. She's a CHRISTIAN!!! No, like a REAL one."

"I just want you to know that I don't care that you're a Christian. Even though I'm not supposed to be friends with Christians, I don't think you're a bad one."

"Are you a Good Christian? Or a Bad Christian?"

"You're not going to launch a Crusade on me, are you?"

"I just want you to know that I don't agree with anything you do and that I think you and your 'people' do dangerous, scary things. But I'm up for a new job this week, so if you wouldn't mind praying for me, that would be great."


Friday, July 9, 2010

Goddess, Speak

(Nabbed from my friend Sylvie...)

A girl whispered "Goddess, speak to me"
And a meadowlark sang but the girl did not hear.
So the girl yelled "Goddess speak to me!"
And the thunder rolled across the sky.
But the girl did not listen. ... See More
The girl looked around and said "Goddess let me see you"
And a star shone brightly.
But the girl did not notice.
And the girl shouted "Goddess show me a miracle"
And a life was born.
But the girl did not know.
So, the girl cried out in despair.
"Touch me Goddess and let me know that you are here!"
Where upon Goddess reached down and touched the girl.
But the girl brushed the butterfly away and walked on.

(Stupid girl.)

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Tweet Tweet

I think I'm going to start a Twitter account and talk about Tarot.

If I do, will you read it?